I’ve always seen queer lit as full of stereotypes and oversimplifications. I just have to tell you how much I love the complexity- and the humaness in the literature you have created. I always wondered how- when it’s my turn- I will do that, make it queerness ok naturally in a book. You’ve done a very, very, very good job.

Thank you for doing what you are doing- as a woman, in love with a woman, raising a daughter, expecting twin girls- I think books like Ash will create a warmer society for our family to live in. Can you imagine a world where anything is a possibility? When you don’t have to “come out” because well it doesn’t matter if it’s a man or woman? Books like Ash set the stage for that. Thank you, again.

As I noted at the beginning of the first post in this series, these posts are primarily meant for straight writers who are interested in writing LGBTQ characters. I should add that they are also meant for those who don’t have much prior knowledge of LGBTQ people. My purpose in listing out these stereotypes is to simply provide a safe place to talk about them. I’ve met a number of writers who don’t even know where to begin when it comes to thinking about stereotypes.

Obviously not every gay person “passes” — and those who do “pass” have to deal with other, complex issues. My goal here is to do my part to educate writers, so that when they write an LGBTQ character, they understand that gay people are more than a simple (and often misunderstood) stereotype.

And, you know, I made an It Gets Better video, too. I’m a lifelong fan of “mannish women.”

I was really excited to read this blog. Hideous stereotypes exist outside as well as inside of the GLBT community, particularly when it comes to bisexuals and genderqueers. I’ve had the privilege of writing for a brand of books, comics, games, etc. with a powerful and diverse group of writers who love to spin stereotypes. In my first comic series, I featured a mixed race straight couple with an adopted child, a mixed race, committed lesbian couple (where one of the women would probably identify as asexual more than lesbian), heavy weapons specialists who wear prada, androgynous and soft butch mothers, devoted single fathers, gay people who are also very Christian, girls who fight, and, though many of my characters are strong women, there is no emasculation of men and more. It’s great fun and, I’ve found, realistic. People are never cookie-cutter.

On the subject of coming out stories, I agree that the market has been saturated with them, but I do think they are still necessary, particularly if addressing current-day issues realistically. While acceptance of the queer community is on a rise, opposition to it is getting deeper in some areas. As a woman who came out in a very conservative Christian household, it was extremely hard to not only accept my own sexuality, but try to face down what my sexuality meant in regards to my religion and sense of faith. I spent years leading a complete double life (which is so damning and exhausting on the soul) and, once reconciled and proud, I had to face nearly everyone I knew and grew up with telling me about hell and sin and every ugly anti-gay argument imaginable. Kids in this situation (or who come from any anti-gay background, whether religiously or culturally or personally) need to know that 1.) They’re not freaks. Nor are they alone, 2.) The importance of being true to themselves and finding no shame in being who they are, and 3.) They *can* lead good, happy lives despite everything they’re told about being gay. This helps the panic many go through when their world starts changing and they’re not only worried about the life they live now, but their eternity as well. There are so many terrifying practices on the rise right now, from “therapists” making thousands of dollars offering medication and counseling to “cure” kids of their gayness to people actually performing exorcisms on teenagers. The biggest thing about writing such stories is that they have to be realistic and fleshed out. There are so many other fears and worries that go through someone’s mind when coming out than just “how do I deal with being attracted to the same sex.”

Hmm. Seems I have written an essay. Forgive my wordiness.